We come to marriage with our ideas about how money is to be spent, how much we should save, how much we should give, and other financial matters. We often have strong emotional attachments to our attitudes toward stability.

There is no quick solution to reaching marital unity in the area of finances, but each couple can and must find a way to do it. The process requires talking, listening, understanding, and seeking a new way - not my way or your way but our way. We must try to understand why we feel and think as we do, and we must be willing to change. If we dogmatically refuse to understand the viewpoint of our mate and reject change, finances can destroy the marriage.

Life’s meaning is found not in money but in intimate relationships. Marriage is meant to be the most intimate of all human relationships. We must not allow our conflicts over money to destroy our intimacy. Reaching an agreement on finances— especially tithing— must be a high priority.

Second Chronicles 24:10 demonstrates that the best giving is glad giving. If you and your spouse can become glad givers together, you will experience an intimacy unlike a person anything else you have experienced.

Take time to pray and thank God for the awesome responsibility. He has given you to manage His money. Ask Him to help you and your spouse keep a proper perspective on money, so that you may honor Him in all your decisions.

Discuss questions and reflect:

How do you feel about giving 10 percent of what you earn to the Lord? Be specific.

What does it mean to be a “steward” of God’s resources?

In what areas do you and your spouse disagree about money? What steps can you take to come to some agreement?

Consider these passages for further study on Stewardship:

Deuteronomy 15:9-11

Do not be mean spirited and refuse someone a loan because the year for cancelling debts is close at hand. If you refuse to make the loan and the needy person cries out to the Lord, you will be considered guilty of sin. Give generously to the poor, not grudgingly, for the Lord your God will bless you in everything you do. There will always be some in the land who are poor. That is why I am commanding you to share freely with the poor and with other Israelites in need.

Proverbs 24:3-4 A house is built by wisdom and becomes strong through good sense. Through knowledge, its rooms are filled with all sorts of precious riches and valuables.

I Timothy 6:17-18 Teach those who are rich in this world not to be proud and not to trust in their money, which is so unreliable. Their trust should be in God, who richly gives us all we need for our enjoyment. Tell them to use their money to do good. They should be rich in good works and generous to those in need, always being ready to share with others.

Always pray to do the right thing and have wisdom with our decisions about money and how it impacts others around us. Grateful for the thoughts of Gary Chapman.