Psalm 23 perfectly captures the spiritual intimacy between God and David. That same intimacy is available to anyone—or any couple—who seeks it. Spiritual intimacy between a husband and wife is not spontaneously created in the exchange of vows. It's something that must be worked at.
Spiritual intimacy is created by discussing thoughts about spiritual realities. For example, a wife reads Psalm 23 and is intrigues by the personal pronouns: "The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need" (Psalm 23:1). She discusses it with her husband, and he tells her about his experience with a shepherd in Australia. They experience spiritual intimacy.
Shared experiences foster spiritual intimacy. A husband and wife attend worship services together, share a hymn book, and sing the same words. They take notes from the pastor's sermon. On the way home, they talk about the service. They are building spiritual intimacy.
Praying together is another way of building spiritual intimacy. Two people joining in honest personal prayer will discover a deep spiritual unity. If you find it uncomfortable to verbalize prayers in front of your spouse, try silent praying. Though no words are uttered audibly, your hearts will move closer to each other, and you will experience spiritual intimacy.
Take time to pray and bring to the Lord the obstacles that prevent you from experiencing spiritual intimacy with each other. Ask Him to give you the wisdom and resolve to overcome those obstacles and become spiritually intimate.
Take time to discuss and reflect on these questions:
When did you last have a really good conversation about spiritual things?
When do you feel most spiritually intimate with each other?
What keeps you from being more spiritually intimate with each other?
Consider these passages for further study on Spiritual intimacy:
Genesis 2:18-25 18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
19 Now the Lord God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals.
But for Adam[a] no suitable helper was found. 21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs[b] and then closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib[c] he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
23 The man said,
“This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
for she was taken out of man.”
24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
25 Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.
Philippians 3:7-11 7 But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. 8 What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ 9 and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in[a] Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith. 10 I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, 11 and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead.
1 Peter 3:7-12 7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
Suffering for Doing Good
8 Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. 9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 10 For,
“Whoever would love life
and see good days
must keep their tongue from evil
and their lips from deceitful speech.
11 They must turn from evil and do good;
they must seek peace and pursue it.
12 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous
and his ears are attentive to their prayer,
but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”[a]
Psalm 23:1-6
Find ways to make you comfortable sharing spiritual conversations with those you love.