When we confess to God, it means that what we have done is wrong. Confession makes no attempt to minimize our wrongdoing but openly admits that our behavior is inexcusable. first John 1:9 tells us God stands ready to forgive those who admit their sins.

After confessing to God, you must confess to the person you’ve wronged.

In marriage, that is your spouse. Your confession might go something like this: “I’ve been thinking about us, and I realize that in a lot of ways I have failed you. I sat down the other day and made a list of things I feel I have done that are wrong. I have asked God to forgive me for each of the things, and if you have a few minutes, I’d like to share my list with you and ask if you would forgive me as well. I really want the future to be different, and I think this is where I need to start.

Take time to pray and tell the Lord:

Praise Him for His willingness to forgive and restore you.

Confess any sins that are eating at your conscience.

Ask Him to bless your efforts to repair relationships that were damaged by your sin.

Take time to reflect:

How does the expression “Right actions begin with right thoughts” apply to your discussion of confession and forgiveness?

When is the best time to talk about issues in your marriage?

How would your spouse respond if you came to him or her with the words of confession in the devotion?

Consider these passages for further study on Confession:

Psalm 32:1-7 Oh, what joy for those whose disobedience is forgiven, whose sin is put out of sight!

Yes, what joy for those whose record the Lord has cleared of guilt, whose lives are lived in complete honesty!

When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long.

Day and night your hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in the summer heat.

Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt. I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.” And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.

Therefore, let all the godly pray to you while there is still time, that they may not drown in the floodwaters of judgment.

For you are my hiding place; you protect me from trouble. You surround me with songs of victory.

Proverbs 28:13 People Who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy.

James 5:16-18 Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. Elijah was as human as we are, and yet when he prayed earnestly that no rain would fall, none fell for three and a half years! Then, when he prayed again, the sky sent down rain and the earth began to yield its crops.

The first step in being aware is a step to put together and organize what needs to be changed to make things right. Great tips to reflect on from Gary Chapman.

In addition to the injustices caused by evil, Christians often struggle with apparent personal inequities. For example, “Why did my child die from cancer when others who are less righteous continue to live?” Such questions remind us that we have limited perspectives. First, Peter 1:5-7 tells us that the trials that bring us grief may be used to refine our faith. Romans 8:28 says that God works good out of everything.

While these positive purposes are true, they still do not answer all our questions in times of pain and loss. The call of God is that we will trust Him in the darkness as we trust Him in the light. He has not changed, even though our circumstances have been painfully altered.

Take some time to pray individually or as a couple. In your prayer…

Thank God for His patience and understanding when you get angry at Him;

Confess any anger you may feel toward Him right now;

Ask Him to give you comfort and peace as you work through suffering and grief.

Take time to discuss together or reflect on these questions:

When was the last time you felt anger toward God?

What did you do about it? Did it help?

How can you maintain a solid relationship with Him even when you don’t understand why He allows certain things to happen?

Consider these passages for further study on Trusting God:

Psalm 18:2 The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer;
    my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge,
    my shield^[a] and the horn^[b] of my salvation, my stronghold.

Nahum 1:7 The Lord is good,
    a refuge in times of trouble.
He cares for those who trust in him,

2 Corinthians 3:4-6 ⁴ Such confidence we have through Christ before God. ⁵ Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God. ⁶ He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant—not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life.

Job 23:1-7

Then Job replied:

² “Even today my complaint is bitter;
    his hand^[a] is heavy in spite of^[b] my groaning.
³ If only I knew where to find him;
    if only I could go to his dwelling!
⁴ I would state my case before him
    and fill my mouth with arguments.
⁵ I would find out what he would answer me,
    and consider what he would say to me.
⁶ Would he vigorously oppose me?
    No, he would not press charges against me.
⁷ There the upright can establish their innocence before him,
    and there I would be delivered forever from my judge.

I am so happy and grateful for the Lord who gives me strength that I don’t have to understand why. I know it would seem to help my pain, yet in the end, I give it to the Lord so that I will be comforted. Leaning on the Lord and trusting in Him will give me strength. This is a good lesson from Gary Chapman‘s perspective. Great prayer examples to practice and grow your relationship with the Lord.

Renoir answered, “The beauty remains; the pain passes.”

When we, strengthened by God, patiently endure physical and emotional suffering, we can affirm the truth of Renoir’s statement. David’s song to the Lord in 2 Samuel 22:17-20 praises God for rescuing him from his enemies, and for leading him to a place of safety. Through his trials, when his very life was in danger, David remained faithful, trusting in God, knowing that God “delights” in His people.

Our pain will pass. But His beauty, as displayed through us, will remain.

Take time to pray and…

Thank God for the patience He’s shown you;

Ask Him to help you endure disappointment and pain;

Ask Him to help you model patience in your relationship with your spouse and others.

Reflect on these questions:

1. On a scale of one to ten, how patient are you? How patient would your loved one say you are?
2. What kinds of situations tend to try your patience the most? Why?
3. How could your spouse help you recognize the beauty of God’s work in you? How could you do the same for your spouse?

Consider these passages for further study on patience:

Psalm 37:7-9

Be still before the Lord
    and wait patiently for him;
do not fret when people succeed in their ways,
    when they carry out their wicked schemes.

⁸ Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
    do not fret—it leads only to evil.
⁹ For those who are evil will be destroyed,
    but those who hope in the Lord will inherit the land.

Psalm 40:1 I waited patiently for the Lord;
    he turned to me and heard my cry.

Romans 12:12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Great thoughts of Gary Chapman as I evaluate how patient I really am because I endure a lot and it’s awareness of where to stand your ground. Keep learning from those who are patient.