Those are strong words – words to which you can anchor your parenting philosophy. “I have never seen the godly abandoned.” Troubles will come and go; God will not. No matter what your situation is now or will be in the future, God will never forsake you. He will always be there for you and see you through to the end. As you raise your children, you’ll find countless opportunities to develop the spiritual aspects of their lives – and your own. Don’t pass them up.

“Their children are a blessing.” As you watch your children grow and mature, you will be heartened to see that God is keeping His promises and blessing your children.

Take some time to pray individually or as a couple. Thank God for providing an example of loving parenthood for you to follow. Ask Him to give the two of you a big-picture view of parenting so that you don’t get bogged down in your day-to-day struggles.

Take time to discuss together or reflect on these questions:

Describe your relationship with your heavenly Father.

Which characteristics of God do you see in your spouse’s parenting style?

Which characteristics of God would you like to incorporate into your parenting style?

Consider these passages for further study on parenting:

Deuteronomy 4:9-10

Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. ¹⁰ Remember the day you stood before the Lord your God at Horeb, when he said to me, “Assemble the people before me to hear my words so that they may learn to revere me as long as they live in the land and may teach them to their children.”

Proverbs 22:6 Start children off on the way they should go,
    and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

Ephesians 6:4 Fathers,^[a] do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

It takes studying and watching positive models to be an encouragement to be a positive parent. We often hear controlling and horrible stories of how families live in different cultures. Let’s embrace love first, and the Lord will bless us—great thoughts of Gary Chapman.

In Hebrews 12:5-6 we read, “And have you forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you as his children? He said, ‘My child don’t make light of the Lord’s discipline, and don’t give up when he corrects you. For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child.” Why does God disciple us? Because He loves us. He wants to turn us from a pathway of destruction.

If you are a parent, you also have to discipline your children for the same reason. Your children will break the rules. Kindly, firmly, and consistently, you must administer discipline. When you do, your children will learn to live under authority. When your children respect your authority. What could be more important?

Take time to pray…

To thank God for trusting you with the responsibility of raising your children;

To ask Him to help you make necessary changes to your parenting style;

Ask Him to give you the wisdom to know how to discipline your children in a way that honors Him.

Reflect on these questions:

Why does discipline often get a bad rep?

When have you experienced the Lord’s discipline? In hindsight, can you recognize His love in that discipline? Explain.

How can you make sure your children recognize the love behind your discipline?

Consider these passages for further study on parenting:

Deuteronomy 4:9 Only be careful and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.

Psalm 113:9

He settles the childless woman in her home
    as a happy mother of children.

Praise the Lord.

2 Timothy 1:5  I am reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also.

I Chronicles 13:9-14

When they came to the threshing floor of Kidon, Uzzah reached out his hand to steady the ark, because the oxen stumbled. ¹⁰ The Lord’s anger burned against Uzzah, and he struck him down because he had put his hand on the ark. So he died there before God.

¹¹ Then David was angry because the Lord’s wrath had broken out against Uzzah, and to this day that place is called Perez Uzzah.^[a]

¹² David was afraid of God that day and asked, “How can I ever bring the ark of God to me?” ¹³ He did not take the ark to be with him in the City of David. Instead, he took it to the house of Obed-Edom the Gittite. ¹⁴ The ark of God remained with the family of Obed-Edom in his house for three months, and the Lord blessed his household and everything he had.

Great thoughts of Gary Chapman. It makes me think of making sure I don’t discipline with emotion first. Showing that you are in control shows your love as you discipline more to me.

Helping kids understand consequences is part of teaching them to make wise decisions. In adulthood, success or failure in life is largely dependent on the ability to make wise decisions. How do children learn to make decisions? The process begins by giving them the freedom to make decisions within boundaries.

The process of choosing between two alternatives helps children learn the value of making wise decisions. When you provide them with choices, you’re doing them a great see and you’re removing a great deal of frustration from yourself. Forcing children to say thank you is simply getting compliance. But when they suffer the consequence of not saying thank you, they learn to say it. When you give a child the opportunity to make decisions within boundaries, you are respecting his or her dignity. You are recognizing that a child is a person, not a machine. People have choices, and those choices always impact those who make them and others. What a valuable lesson for a child to learn.

Take time to pray. Thank God for showing you how a loving Father metes out discipline and consequences. Ask Him to give you wisdom and resolve as you help your children understand that wrong actions have consequences.

Discuss and reflect:

What mistakes have you made in trying to help your kids understand the consequences?

Are you likely to create a more unified front in your parenting styles?

Consider these passages for further study on parenting.

Deuteronomy 6:6-9

“Always remember these commands I give you today. Teach them to your children, and talk about them when you sit at home and walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them down and tie them to your hands as a sign. Tie them on your forehead to remind you,”
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Proverbs 3:11-12

Hebrews 12:5-11

“You have forgotten the encouraging words that call you his children: “My child, don’t think the Lord’s discipline is worth nothing, and don’t stop trying when he corrects you. The Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as his child.” So hold on through your sufferings, because they are like a father’s discipline. God is treating you as children. All children are disciplined by their fathers. If you are never disciplined (and every child must be disciplined), you are not true child. We have all had fathers here on earth who disciplined us, and we respected them. So it is even more important that we accept discipline from the Father of our spirits so we will have life. Our fathers on earth disciplined us for a short time in the way they thought was best. But God disciplines us to help us, so we can become holy as he is. We do not enjoy being disciplined. It is painful at the time, but later, after we have learned from it, we have peace, because we start living in the right way.”
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Numbers 16-1-50

“Korah, Dathan, Abiram, and On turned against Moses. (Korah was the son of Izhar, the son of Kohath, the son of Levi; Dathan and Abiram were brothers, the sons of Eliab; and On was the son of Peleth; Dathan, Abiram, and On were from the tribe of Reuben.) These men gathered two hundred fifty other Israelite men, well-known leaders chosen by the community, and challenged Moses. They came as a group to speak to Moses and Aaron and said, “You have gone too far. All the people are holy, every one of them, and the Lord is among them. So why do you put yourselves above all the people of the Lord?” When Moses heard this, he bowed facedown. Then he said to Korah and all his followers: “Tomorrow morning the Lord will show who belongs to him. He will bring the one who is holy near to him; he will bring to himself the person he chooses. So Korah, you and all your followers do this: Get some pans for burning incense. Tomorrow put fire and incense in them and take them before the Lord. He will choose the man who is holy. You Levites have gone too far.” Moses also said to Korah, “Listen, you Levites. The God of Israel has separated you from the rest of the Israelites. He brought you near to himself to do the work in the Lord’s Holy Tent and to stand before all the Israelites and serve them. Isn’t that enough? He has brought you and all your fellow Levites near to himself, yet now you want to be priests. You and your followers have joined together against the Lord. Your complaint is not against Aaron.” Then Moses called Dathan and Abiram, the sons of Eliab, but they said, “We will not come! You have brought us out of fertile land to this desert to kill us, and now you want to order us around. You haven’t brought us into a fertile land; you haven’t given us any land with fields and vineyards. Will you put out the eyes of these men? No! We will not come!” Then Moses became very angry and said to the Lord, “Don’t accept their gifts. I have not taken anything from them, not even a donkey, and I have not done wrong to any of them.” Then Moses said to Korah, “You and all your followers must stand before the Lord tomorrow. And Aaron will stand there with you and them. Each of you must take your pan and put incense in it; present these two hundred fifty pans before the Lord. You and Aaron must also present your pans.” So each man got his pan and put burning incense in it and stood with Moses and Aaron at the entrance to the Meeting Tent. Korah gathered all his followers who were against Moses and Aaron, and they stood at the entrance to the Meeting Tent. Then the glory of the Lord appeared to everyone. The Lord said to Moses and Aaron, “Move away from these men so I can destroy them quickly.” But Moses and Aaron bowed facedown and cried out, “God, you are the God over the spirits of all people. Please don’t be angry with this whole group. Only one man has really sinned.” Then the Lord said to Moses, “Tell everyone to move away from the tents of Korah, Dathan, and Abiram.” Moses stood and went to Dathan and Abiram; the elders of Israel followed him. Moses warned the people, “Move away from the tents of these evil men! Don’t touch anything of theirs, or you will be destroyed because of their sins.” So they moved away from the tents of Korah, Dathan, and Abiram. Dathan and Abiram were standing outside their tents with their wives, children, and little babies. Then Moses said, “Now you will know that the Lord has sent me to do all these things; it was not my idea. If these men die a normal death—the way men usually die—then the Lord did not really send me. But if the Lord does something new, you will know they have insulted the Lord. The ground will open and swallow them. They will be buried alive and will go to the place of the dead, and everything that belongs to them will go with them.” When Moses finished saying these things, the ground under the men split open. The earth opened and swallowed them and all their families. All Korah’s men and everything they owned went down. They were buried alive, going to the place of the dead, and everything they owned went with them. Then the earth covered them. They died and were gone from the community. The people of Israel around them heard their screams and ran away, saying, “The earth will swallow us, too!” Then a fire came down from the Lord and destroyed the two hundred fifty men who had presented the incense. The Lord said to Moses, “Tell Eleazar, son of Aaron, the priest, to take all the incense pans out of the fire. Have him scatter the coals a long distance away. But the incense pans are still holy. Take the pans of these men who sinned and lost their lives, and hammer them into flat sheets that will be used to cover the altar. They are holy, because they were presented to the Lord, and they will be a sign to the Israelites.” So Eleazar the priest gathered all the bronze pans that had been brought by the men who were burned up. He had the pans hammered into flat sheets to put on the altar, as the Lord had commanded him through Moses. These sheets were to remind the Israelites that only descendants of Aaron should burn incense before the Lord. Anyone else would die like Korah and his followers. The next day all the Israelites complained against Moses and Aaron and said, “You have killed the Lord’s people.” When the people gathered to complain against Moses and Aaron, they turned toward the Meeting Tent, and the cloud covered it. The glory of the Lord appeared. Then Moses and Aaron went in front of the Meeting Tent. The Lord said to Moses, “Move away from these people so I can destroy them quickly.” So Moses and Aaron bowed facedown. Then Moses said to Aaron, “Get your pan and put fire from the altar and incense in it. Hurry to the people and remove their sins. The Lord is angry with them; the sickness has already started.” So Aaron did as Moses said. He ran to the middle of the people, where the sickness had already started among them. So Aaron offered incense to remove their sin. He stood between the dead and the living, and the sickness stopped there. But 14,700 people died from that sickness, in addition to those who died because of Korah. Then Aaron went back to Moses at the entrance to the Meeting Tent. The terrible sickness had been stopped.”
‭‭Numbers‬ ‭16‬:‭1‬-‭50‬ ‭NCV‬‬
https://bible.com/bible/105/num.16.1-50.NCV

Always seeking ways to become a better parent and seeing how to improve relationships. Thankful for these thoughts of Gary Chapman.

That’s not always easy, is it? Between traffic jams, job pressures, arguments with neighbors, and assorted unhealthy personal habits, honorability is a hard standard to maintain. The keys are diligence, wisdom, and a sense of purpose. If we’re serious about being honorable parents, we’ll keep that goal foremost in our minds. When we react to daily circumstances, then it will be with an eye on maintaining honorability. We’ll learn to ask ourselves, “What would be the honorable thing to do in this situation?”

Take time to pray and thank God for the opportunity to be a positive influence in the lives of your children. Ask Him to give you the wisdom and discipline to make honorable choices in your life.

Take time to discuss together and reflect on these questions:

1. How can you tell what kind of impact you’re having on your children’s lives?
2. In your opinion, what are your three biggest challenges in trying to live honorably? Do you think your spouse would agree with that list?
3. What specific steps can you take to help each other be more honorable parents?

Consider these passages for further study on parenting:

Proverbs 22:4-6

Humility is the fear of the Lord;
    its wages are riches and honor and life.

⁵ In the paths of the wicked are snares and pitfalls,
    but those who would preserve their life stay far from them.

⁶ Start children off on the way they should go,
    and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

Proverbs 31:25-31  

²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
    she can laugh at the days to come.
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women do noble things,
    but you surpass them all.”
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
    and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Colossians 3:20-21

Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

²¹ Fathers,^[a] do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.

Whenever you put others first, it forces you to make sure you are living your life in the right way. Think about how others look at you in your actions, etc., and know exactly what you want them to think or say. When you put the Lord first in what he says is honorable, it forces you to find ways to be honorable.