For some people, that kind of guidance seems to come naturally. For others, though, it takes a lot of practice – and usually a lot of trial and error. Where do the two of you fit on the continuum? What kind of teachers are you where your children are concerned?

Here’s a more sobering question: What if your children turn out to be just like you? Would you be concerned? If so, what steps do you need to take? What do you need to change in your parenting? Why not begin that change today?

God is available to help. He has loaded His Word with principles to guild you. He’s also surrounded you with friends, family, and fellow believers to assist you.

Tak time to pray and identify areas of your life in which you’ve failed to reach your potential. Confess any wrong attitudes or actions that have caused you to fail. Ask the Lord to give you the wisdom and courage to change those areas so that you may be a role model to your children.

Discuss and reflect on these questions:

Who do you look to as parenting role models – or simply as good parents?

How is your parenting style similar to theirs? How is it different?

How do the two of you complement each other as parents? In what areas are you both lacking?

Consider these passages for further study on parenting:

Deuteronomy 6:4-9 Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.^[a] 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. ⁶ These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. ⁷ Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. ⁸ Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. ⁹ Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Proverbs 1:8-9 Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction
    and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.
⁹ They are a garland to grace your head
    and a chain to adorn your neck.

Ephesians 6:1-4 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ² “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— ³ “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”^[a]

⁴ Fathers,^[b] do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Psalm 124:1-8 If the Lord had not been on our side—
    let Israel say—
² if the Lord had not been on our side
    when people attacked us,
³ they would have swallowed us alive
    when their anger flared against us;
⁴ the flood would have engulfed us,
    the torrent would have swept over us,
⁵ the raging waters
    would have swept us away.

⁶ Praise be to the Lord,
    who has not let us be torn by their teeth.
⁷ We have escaped like a bird
    from the fowler’s snare;
the snare has been broken,
    and we have escaped.
⁸ Our help is in the name of the Lord,
    the Maker of heaven and earth.

Great devotional to evaluate of Gary Chapman.

Looking for examples of other great families and what they do to create valuable relationships helps understand actions to apply. Share what has helped you.

In contrast, speaking of the God of Israel, he wrote, “O Israel, trust the Lord! He is your helper and your shield… the Lord remembers us and will bless us” (Psalm 115:9,12). Clearly, the God of Israel expressed His love by acts of service to those who called on Him.

As God’s people, you and your spouse can follow the Lord’s lead. Think about the people in your life to whom you can show acts of service. Who might benefit from your commitment to follow God’s example? How many lives can you change by reaching out to people in ways that make their lives easier? How can you be instruments of God’s grace? And how might the two of you grow closer in the process?

Take time to pray… and

Thank God for His acts of service on behalf of His people throughout the Bible;

Thank Him for His acts of service in your life and in your family;

Ask Him to bless your efforts to perform acts of service as a love language toward others.

Discuss and reflect on these questions:

Why is it so easy to forget the Lord’s past acts of service?

How can you keep those acts of service fresh in your minds?

How can you set an example for your children (or others) through acts of service?

Read these passages for further study on Acts of Service:

Matthew 5:13-16

You are the salt of the earth. But what good is salt if it has lost its flavor? Can you make it salty again? It will be thrown out and trampled underfoot as worthless. You are the light of the world – like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your Heavenly Father.

Philippians 2:1-4

Is there any encouragement from belonging to Christ? Any comfort from his love? Any fellowship together in the Spirit? Are your hearts tender and compassionate? Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one mind and purpose.

Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.

I Peter 4:10-11

God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies. Then everything you do will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to him forever and ever! Amen!

Psalm 115:1-18

“Not to us, Lord, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness. Why do the nations say, “Where is their God?” Our God is in heaven; he does whatever pleases him. But their idols are silver and gold, made by human hands. They have mouths, but cannot speak, eyes, but cannot see. They have ears, but cannot hear, noses, but cannot smell. They have hands, but cannot feel, feet, but cannot walk, nor can they utter a sound with their throats. Those who make them will be like them, and so will all who trust in them. All you Israelites, trust in the Lord— he is their help and shield. House of Aaron, trust in the Lord— he is their help and shield. You who fear him, trust in the Lord— he is their help and shield. The Lord remembers us and will bless us: He will bless his people Israel, he will bless the house of Aaron, he will bless those who fear the Lord— small and great alike. May the Lord cause you to flourish, both you and your children. May you be blessed by the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. The highest heavens belong to the Lord, but the earth he has given to mankind. It is not the dead who praise the Lord, those who go down to the place of silence; it is we who extol the Lord, both now and forevermore. Praise the Lord.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭115‬:‭1‬-‭18‬ ‭NIV‬‬
https://bible.com/bible/111/psa.115.1-18.NIV

Love the Lord who praises. Great thoughts of Gary Chapman. Use the talents the Lord gave you and bless others with your actions in how you serve the Lord.

Some parents have forgotten how to be confident in a fallen world. Parenting has changed just as our world has changed. As our children grow, we must adapt and tweak our parenting style. Finding the right balance is next to impossible. And any balance found is likely to be upset as our children move into yet another stage of development.

Most of us are well aware of the mistakes we’ve made as parents. Yet, we don’t have to be defined by those mistakes. We can use them as educational tools to help us make the necessary changes for the future. As our children mature, so should we.

Because we’re human, we’ll never be perfect parents. But we serve a perfect God with a deep interest in our children. His Word can inspire, comfort, and empower us to parent.

Take time to pray and thank God for blessing you with your children. Talk to Him about your parenting challenges and disappointments. Ask Him to bless your efforts to raise children who will bring Him honor and glory.

When you make time to discuss or reflect on these questions together:

How did you picture yourself as a parent before you had kids?

What has surprised you most about parenting?

What do you want your parenting legacy to be?

Consider these passages for further study on parenting.

Psalm 138:8 The Lord will vindicate me;
    your love, Lord, endures forever—
    do not abandon the works of your hands.

Isaiah 44:3-5 For I will pour water on the thirsty land,
    and streams on the dry ground;
I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring,
    and my blessing on your descendants.
⁴ They will spring up like grass in a meadow,
    like poplar trees by flowing streams.
⁵ Some will say, ‘I belong to the Lord’;
    others will call themselves by the name of Jacob;
still others will write on their hand, ‘The Lord’s,’
    and will take the name Israel.

Jeremiah 31:17 So there is hope for your descendants,”
declares the Lord.
    “Your children will return to their own land.

Psalm 112:1-10 Praise the Lord.^[b]

Blessed are those who fear the Lord,
    who find great delight in his commands.

² Their children will be mighty in the land;
    the generation of the upright will be blessed.
³ Wealth and riches are in their houses,
    and their righteousness endures forever.
⁴ Even in darkness light dawns for the upright,
    for those who are gracious and compassionate and righteous.
⁵ Good will come to those who are generous and lend freely,
    who conduct their affairs with justice.

⁶ Surely the righteous will never be shaken;
    they will be remembered forever.
⁷ They will have no fear of bad news;
    their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord.
⁸ Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear;
    in the end they will look in triumph on their foes.
⁹ They have freely scattered their gifts to the poor,
    their righteousness endures forever;
    their horn^[c] will be lifted high in honor.

¹⁰ The wicked will see and be vexed,
    they will gnash their teeth and waste away;
    the longings of the wicked will come to nothing.

Great thoughts of Gary Chapman. Finding the strengths helps focus on seeing more ways to thrive. It can also show where we lean on others with our weaknesses. It takes a village to bring up a child.

The realization that we are God’s children now and forever should motivate us to praise Him. If your primary love language is words of affirmation, expressing verbal praise to God will be easy. However, it’s also easy to use standard words and phrases expressed at regular times and places. If this happens, even your praise, which starts out as authentic, can become a mere ritual. Thus, you enhance your love relationship with God when you think creatively about places and ways to express praise to Him.

If you worship with your spouse, you can encourage each other to be creative and original in your praise. In the process, you’ll create a spiritual bond that can last a lifetime.

Take some time to pray individually or as a couple. Make it a time of worship to praise God for His creation, love for you, and goodness to your family.

If you have more time, discuss together or reflect on these questions:

What standard words and phrases do you hear in praise and worship settings?

Which words do you use most often when praising God?

What is the ideal setting for praising and worshipping God? Why?

Consider these passages for further study on Praise and Worship.

Psalm 71:22-24

I will praise you with the harp
    for your faithfulness, my God;
I will sing praise to you with the lyre,
    Holy One of Israel.
²³ My lips will shout for joy
    when I sing praise to you—
    I whom you have delivered.
²⁴ My tongue will tell of your righteous acts
    all day long,
for those who wanted to harm me
    have been put to shame and confusion.

Romans 14:11 It is written:

“‘As surely as I live,’ says the Lord,
‘every knee will bow before me;
    every tongue will acknowledge God.’”^[a]

Phillippians 2:9-11

Therefore, God exalted him to the highest place
    and gave him the name that is above every name,
¹⁰ that at the name of Jesus, every knee should bow,
    in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
¹¹ and every tongue acknowledges that Jesus Christ is Lord,
    to the glory of God the Father.

Psalm 95:1-7

Come, let us sing for joy to the Lord;
    let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.
² Let us come before him with thanksgiving
    and extol him with music and song.

³ For the Lord is the great God,
    the great King above all gods.
⁴ In his hand are the depths of the earth,
    and the mountain peaks belong to him.
⁵ The sea is his, for he made it,
    and his hands formed the dry land.

⁶ Come, let us bow down in worship,
    let us kneel before the Lord, our Maker;
⁷ for he is our God
    and we are the people of his pasture,
    the flock under his care.

Today, if only you would hear his voice,

When you think of ways to praise the Lord best, you think of ways to share your love. Be aware of your love language and use your abilities and talents to praise the Lord. Everyone shows it differently and shouldn’t be judged by a right or wrong method. Give it your best.

Since we are most sensitive to the discipline that relates directly to our primary love language, God often chooses that language to bring us to a place of growth. For example, for those of us who respond best to words of affirmation, the heavens become silent. Work colleagues begin to deliver messages of condemnation. Spouses and children become critical. With empty hearts, we cry out to God in desperation and begin our journey homeward.

God knows us better than we know ourselves. He knows how to get our attention. His discipline is not always pleasant, but it is always purposeful. Can the same be said of the discipline in your home?

Take some time to pray and ask the Lord to help you:

Respond appropriately to His discipline.

Mete out your own discipline in a way that honors Him.

Help your kids (or the object of your discipline) recognize the loving concern behind your discipline.

If you have more time, discuss together or reflect on these questions:

When it comes to discipline, are you more likely to err on the side of harshness or leniency?

What signals do you send when you discipline in your family?

What can you do to make your discipline more like God’s?

Consider these passages for further study on Discipline:

Proverbs 3:11-12 My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline,
    and do not resent his rebuke,
¹² because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
    as a father the son he delights in.^[a]

Proverbs 6:20-23 My son, keep your father’s command
    and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.
²¹ Bind them always on your heart;
    fasten them around your neck.
²² When you walk, they will guide you;
    when you sleep, they will watch over you;
    when you awake, they will speak to you.
²³ For this command is a lamp,
    this teaching is a light,
and correction and instruction
    are the way to life,

Proverbs 15:5 A fool spurns a parent’s discipline,
    but whoever heeds correction shows prudence.

Psalm 94:1-23 The Lord is a God who avenges.
    O God who avenges, shine forth.
² Rise up, Judge of the earth;
    pay back to the proud what they deserve.
³ How long, Lord, will the wicked,
    how long will the wicked be jubilant?

⁴ They pour out arrogant words;
    all the evildoers are full of boasting.
⁵ They crush your people, Lord;
    they oppress your inheritance.
⁶ They slay the widow and the foreigner;
    they murder the fatherless.
⁷ They say, “The Lord does not see;
    the God of Jacob takes no notice.”

⁸ Take notice, you senseless ones among the people;
    you fools, when will you become wise?
⁹ Does he who fashioned the ear not hear?
    Does he who formed the eye not see?
¹⁰ Does he who disciplines nations not punish?
    Does he who teaches mankind lack knowledge?
¹¹ The Lord knows all human plans;
    he knows that they are futile.

¹² Blessed is the one you discipline, Lord,
    the one you teach from your law;
¹³ you grant them relief from days of trouble,
    till a pit is dug for the wicked.
¹⁴ For the Lord will not reject his people;
    he will never forsake his inheritance.
¹⁵ Judgment will again be founded on righteousness,
    and all the upright in heart will follow it.

¹⁶ Who will rise up for me against the wicked?
    Who will take a stand for me against evildoers?
¹⁷ Unless the Lord had given me help,
    I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death.
¹⁸ When I said, “My foot is slipping,”
    your unfailing love, Lord, supported me.
¹⁹ When anxiety was great within me,
    your consolation brought me joy.

²⁰ Can a corrupt throne be allied with you—
    a throne that brings on misery by its decrees?
²¹ The wicked band together against the righteous
    and condemn the innocent to death.
²² But the Lord has become my fortress,
    and my God the rock in whom I take refuge.
²³ He will repay them for their sins
    and destroy them for their wickedness;
    the Lord our God will destroy them.

When spouses neglect their own love relationship, either intentionally or unintentionally, they do so to the detriment of their children. Research clearly shows that the effect of divorce on a child is devastating. Divorces normally do not occur on the spur of the moment. They are preceded by months and sometimes years of neglecting the marital relationship. Therefore, for the conscientious parent, there is nothing more important than rekindling or keeping alive an intimate relationship with his or her spouse. The antidote to divorce is to stop the process of drifting apart. Choose to paddle your canoes toward each other rather than away from each other. Commit yourselves to your relationship and your family. Make your marriage a priority. You will please yourselves, your children, and God.

Take some time to pray individually or as a couple. As you pray, Thank God for the relationship with your spouse that He has blessed you with. Ask God to help you identify the times you have failed to paddle toward each other. Ask Him to help you and your spouse learn to move toward each other in all circumstances.

If you have more time, discuss together or reflect on these questions:

Describe the effects of divorce on a child, whether from your own experience or from stories you’ve heard from friends or loved ones.

What would your spouse say about the priority you place on your marriage?

How might you and your spouse “paddle your canoes toward each other”?

Consider these passages for further study on Intimacy:

Psalm 63:1-11

You, God, are my God,
    earnestly I seek you;
I thirst for you,
    my whole being longs for you,
in a dry and parched land
    where there is no water.

² I have seen you in the sanctuary
    and beheld your power and your glory.
³ Because your love is better than life,
    my lips will glorify you.
⁴ I will praise you as long as I live,
    and in your name I will lift up my hands.
⁵ I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of foods;
    with singing lips my mouth will praise you.

⁶ On my bed I remember you;
    I think of you through the watches of the night.
⁷ Because you are my help,
    I sing in the shadow of your wings.
⁸ I cling to you;
    your right hand upholds me.

⁹ Those who want to kill me will be destroyed;
    they will go down to the depths of the earth.
¹⁰ They will be given over to the sword
    and become food for jackals.

¹¹ But the king will rejoice in God;
    all who swear by God will glory in him,
    while the mouths of liars will be silenced.

I Corinthians 10:31 So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

James 4:8 Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

Psalm 89:1-2 I will sing of the Lord’s great love forever;
    with my mouth I will make your faithfulness known
    through all generations.
² I will declare that your love stands firm forever,
    that you have established your faithfulness in heaven itself.

Great thoughts from Gary Chapman. Knowing each other’s love language helps to keep it top of mind when keeping your loved ones happy in your circle. Seeing other’s points of view and the consequences of each decision enables you to slow down and ensure you are making the right decision. Make time for the important things, and it will show.

Could it be that deep inside hurting couples exists an invisible “emotional love tank” with its gauge on empty? Could the misbehavior, withdrawal, harsh words, and critical spirit occur because of that empty tank? If we could find a way to fill it, could the marriage be reborn? With a full tank, would couples be able to create an emotional climate where it is possible to discuss differences and resolve conflicts? Could that tank be the key that makes marriage work?

Keeping the emotional love tank full is as important to a marriage as maintaining the proper oil level is to an automobile. Running your marriage on an empty ‘love tank’ may cost you even more than trying to drive your car without oil. Understanding that can save a shaky marriage and enhance the emotional climate of a good marriage.

Learning to speak the primary love language of your spouse may radically affect his or her behavior. People behave differently when their emotional love tanks are full.

Take some time to pray individually or as a couple. As you pray…

Thank God for creating you with the capacity to love and be loved;

Share your feelings about the way your emotional needs have (or haven’t) been met;

Ask Him to bless your efforts to keep your spouse’s love tank full.

If you have more time…

Discuss together or reflect on these questions:

Describe what it’s like to have your love tank empty.

Describe what it’s like to have your love tank full.

What changes might you see in your spouse if his or her love tank were full?

Consider these passages for further study on Meeting Needs.

Philippians 2:4 says not to look to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

Hebrews 13:16 And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.

I John 3:17  If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person?

Psalm 85:10 Love and faithfulness meet together;
    righteousness and peace kiss each other.

Be a blessing to those around you. Hold on to those memories. Evaluate yourself and how you can be the best to the Lord.

Psalm 77 is a personal expression of someone going through a major crisis. Note that there is first a description of the pain of being estranged from God and others. But out of that pain, the psalmist turns to God.

God is vitally concerned about you. Jesus’s words in Matthew 11:28 are directed to you: “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.”

You are weary from much stress. You carry heavy burdens such as guilt, anger, hostility, and anxiety. Notice that Jesus doesn’t ask that you lay the burden aside and come to Him but rather that you just come. He has not asked you to handle your own problems, nor has He promised to take away the problems, but He has promised rest.

Take some time to pray individually or as a couple. Thank Him for providing all your needs. Ask Him to protect your marriage from undue strain by reminding you to come to Him for the peace of mind no one else can offer.

If you have more time, discuss together or reflect on these questions:

What do you need more than anything from God right now?

Have you ever looked to your spouse for things only God can give?

How can you work together to find your peace and rest in God?

Consider these passages for further study on Rest:

Psalms 29:11, The Lord gives his people strength. The Lord blesses them with peace.

Psalms 85:8 I listen carefully to what God the Lord is saying, for he speaks to his faithful people. But let them not return to their foolish ways.

John 14:27 I am leaving you with a gift – peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.

Psalm 77:1-20

I cry out to God; yes, I shout. Oh, that God would listen to me! When I was in deep trouble, I searched for the Lord, All night long I prayed, with hands lifted toward heaven, but my soul was not comforted. I think of God, and I moan, overwhelmed with longing for his help.

You don’t let me sleep. I am too distressed even to pray! I think of the good old days, long since ended, when my nights were filled with joyful songs. I search my soul and ponder the difference now.

Has the Lord rejected me forever? Will he never again be kind to me?

Is his unfailing love gone forever? Have his promises permanently failed?

Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has he slammed the door on his compassion?

And I said, “This is my fate; the Most High has turned his hand against me.”

But then I recall all you have done, O Lord; I remember your wonderful deeds of long ago.

They are constantly in my thoughts. I cannot stop thinking about your mighty works.

O God, your ways are holy. Is there any god as mighty as you?

You are the God of great wonders! You demonstrate your awesome power among the nations.

By your strong arm, you redeemed your people, the descendants of Jacob and Joseph.

When the Red Sea saw you, O God, its waters looked and trembled! The sea quaked to its very depths.

The clouds poured down rain; the thunder rumbled in the sky. Your arrows of lightning flashed.

Your thunder roared from the whirlwind; the lightning lit up the world! The earth trembled and shook.

Your road led through the sea, your pathway no one knew was there!

You led your people along that road like a flock of sheep, with Moses and Aaron as their shepherds.

Gary Chapman‘s great thoughts show us that we have resources in the Lord for anything we need. Find your peace in the Lord.

The important thing to remember in dealing with anger- especially anger toward your spouse- is that you do not allow your negative emotions to lead you to wrongful behavior. Sharing your anger with your spouse is essential. Emotions come and go. When we talk about them, they tend to go. When we hold them inside, they tend to stay.

If you find it difficult to break the barrier of silence, try writing your thoughts and feelings in a letter to your spouse. Many times it is easier to write than it is to speak of such feelings. But as you become comfortable writing the letters and your spouse reads them with understanding and comfort and encouragement, you will eventually learn to verbalize your feelings and thoughts. Writing can be a big step in the process of learning how to communicate openly.

Take some time to pray individually or as a couple. Ask God to help you…

Make amends for past incidents in which you expressed anger unhealthily.

Express your anger in a way that strengthens your relationship instead of damaging it.

Create a relationship in which you feel comfortable sharing any emotion.

If you have more time, discuss together or reflect on these questions:

How has anger damaged your relationship in the past?

What changes would you like to see each other make in the way you express anger?

What specific strategies can you use to make sure your anger is dealt with properly?

Consider these passages for further study on anger:

Psalm 7:11 God is an honest judge. He is angry with the wicked every day.

Mark 3:1-6 Jesus went into the synagogue again and noticed a man with a deformed hand. Since it was the Sabbath, Jesus’ enemies watched him closely. If he healed the man’s hand, they planned to accuse him of working on the Sabbath. Jesus said to the man with the deformed hand, Come and stand in front of everyone.” Then he turned to his critics and asked, “Does the law permit good deeds on the Sabbath, or is it a day for doing evil? Is this a day to save life or to destroy it?” But they wouldn’t answer him.

He looked around at them angrily and was deeply saddened by their hard hearts. Then he said to the man, “Hold out your hand.” So the man held out his hand, and it was restored! At once the Pharisees went away and met with the supporters of Herod to plot how to kill Jesus.

John 2:13-17 It was nearly time for the Jewish Passover celebration, so Jesus went to Jerusalem. In the Temple area he saw merchants selling cattle, sheep, and doves for sacrifices; he also saw dealers at tables exchanging foreign money. Jesus made a whip from some ropes and chased them all out of the Temple. He drove out the sheep and cattle, scattered the money changers’ coins over the floor, and turned over their tables. Then, going over to the people who sold doves, he told them, “Get these things out of here. Stop turning my Father’s house into a marketplace!”

Then his disciples remembered this prophecy from the Scriptures: “Passion for God’s house will consume me.”

Psalm 74:1-23

“God, why have you rejected us for so long? Why are you angry with us, the sheep of your pasture? Remember the people you bought long ago. You saved us, and we are your very own. After all, you live on Mount Zion. Make your way through these old ruins; the enemy wrecked everything in the Temple. Those who were against you shouted in your meeting place and raised their flags there. They came with axes raised as if to cut down a forest of trees. They smashed the carved panels with their axes and hatchets. They burned your Temple to the ground; they have made the place where you live unclean. They thought, “We will completely crush them!” They burned every place where God was worshiped in the land. We do not see any signs. There are no more prophets, and no one knows how long this will last. God, how much longer will the enemy make fun of you? Will they insult you forever? Why do you hold back your power? Bring your power out in the open and destroy them! God, you have been our king for a long time. You bring salvation to the earth. You split open the sea by your power and broke the heads of the sea monster. You smashed the heads of the monster Leviathan and gave it to the desert creatures as food. You opened up the springs and streams and made the flowing rivers run dry. Both the day and the night are yours; you made the sun and the moon. You set all the limits on the earth; you created summer and winter. Lord, remember how the enemy insulted you. Remember how those foolish people made fun of you. Do not give us, your doves, to those wild animals. Never forget your poor people. Remember the agreement you made with us, because violence fills every dark corner of this land. Do not let your suffering people be disgraced. Let the poor and helpless praise you. God, arise and defend yourself. Remember the insults that come from those foolish people all day long. Don’t forget what your enemies said; don’t forget their roar as they rise against you always.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭74‬:‭1‬-‭23‬ ‭NCV‬‬
https://bible.com/bible/105/psa.74.1-23.NCV

Gary Chapman‘s thoughts are great. We are blessed with all kinds of emotions to feel. Knowing and learning how to deal with these emotions takes wisdom. Find ways to use this knowledge to grow your wisdom on a regular basis.

Try beginning your conversation with God with these words: “Father, I want to know what You would say to me this day. As I read this passage in Your Word, bring to my mind the things You want me to hear.”

Read the Bible passage with pen in hand, marking those things that stand out. If necessary, read it a second time, saying, “Lord, I’m not sure I understood what You were saying. Please clarify what’s on Your mind for me.”

After you complete the passage, talk to God about what you’ve underlined. If that’s what God is saying to you, you want to respond. Many people read the Bible and then pray about something totally unrelated to what they read. Nothing could be more discourteous. We wouldn’t treat a friend like that. If a friend makes a statement, we have a response to what He is saying.

Take time to pray and thank God that you may never have to guess what He wants from you, that He always speaks to you through His Word. Ask Him to bless your efforts to create a listening atmosphere in your quiet time.

Reflect on these questions:

Are your quiet times more effective when you do them individually or together? Explain.

What prevents you from listening closely to God?

Consider these passages for further study on Listening to God.

Psalm 143:8

“Tell me in the morning about your love, because I trust you. Show me what I should do, because my prayers go up to you.”
‭‭

Lamentations 3:25

“The Lord is good to those who hope in him, to those who seek him.”
‭‭‬ ‭NCV‬‬

Habakkuk 2:1

“I will stand like a guard to watch and place myself at the tower. I will wait to see what he will say to me; I will wait to learn how God will answer my complaint.”
‭‭‬ ‭NCV‬‬

Good thoughts of Gary Chapman to be aware of how much we listen and explain to others what we learn.