Listening is one of the 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader. Leaders must listen for two reasons:

1. to connect with others, and
2. to learn from others.

President Woodrow Wilson said, “The ear of the leader must ring with the voices of the people.” What’s more, a good leader encourages followers to tell him what he needs to know, not what he wants to hear. Sometimes, 50 percent of your leadership involves simple listening. So why did Rehoboam fail at this simple task?

1. Narrow Vision – The people promised to serve him if he lightened their load; he didn’t see it.
2. Poor Decision-making Skills – He wavered on what to do about their request and told them to come back later.
3. Self-centered Focus – He rejected wise counsel because it didn’t align with his desires.
4. Demanding and Impatient Style – He promised to make life tougher, not easier, for his people.

We learn from King Rehoboam the difference between “hearing” and “listening.” Hearing is a function of the ears; the king heard all the spoken words. Listening, however, is a function of the will; leaders listen to connect and to learn. Rehoboam failed to do both, as he refused to listen to history, his followers, the wise counsel of his staff, and to God.

Certainly, we cannot listen to everyone – far too many opposing voices and views cry out for that. So to whom should leaders be listening? Listen especially well to the following:

1. Your Followers – Good leaders take the time to get to know each team member as a person.
2. Your Customers – Good leaders make it a priority to keep in contact with those they serve.
3. Your Competitors – Good leaders don’t imitate the competition; they listen to learn from the encounter.
4. Your Mentors – No leader can afford to be without a mentor’s insight.
5. Your Inner Circle – Leaders must listen to those closest to them to gauge the organization’s pulse.

Finding inspiration and a trusted advisor helps you listen and draw on your own wisdom to make decisions. It can be challenging to find that you are just taking others’ input, so find a way to really listen and make your decisions reflect the wisdom you’ve applied from what you’ve learned from all the ways you’ve listened. Another devotional post of John Maxwell.

2 Chronicles 10:15

¹⁵ So the king did not listen to the people, for this turn of events was from God, to fulfill the word the Lord had spoken to Jeroboam son of Nebat through Ahijah the Shilonite.

Elijah grew tired of his people’s spiritual rebellion and was angry with the false prophets of Baal. He confronted both forces atop Mt. Carmel, and there defeated the devil’s henchmen, although they outnumbered him 850 to 1 (1 Kings 18:19). No one had seen anything like his courage since the day David fought Goliath unremembered years before. And like the underdog David fought Goliath unremembered years before. And like the underdog David, Elijah met the enemy with passion. His eyes drank in the greatness of God, not the numbers of his enemies. This heavenly vision provided the fire that fueled his courage.

Leaders always need courage. No one who wants to bring about change can manage without courage. Courage flamed in Elijah’s heart because:

1. His resolution outweighed his reservations. Although greatly outnumbered, Elijah resolved that Baal had to be confronted at any cost.
2. His desires outweighed his desperation. Although it meant risk, Elijah wanted to honor Yahweh above all else.
3. When our need is greatest (vv. 2,5,21,22).
4. When we take our message to the people (vv. 20,21).
5. When we bring others to a point of decision (v. 21).
6. When we repair and use the altar of God (vv. 23-32).
7. When we face circumstances that only God’s fire will light (vv. 33-35).
8. When we publicly trust God to do what only he can do (vv. 33-37).
9. When we hunger for God to receive glory (vv. 36-39).
10. When we desire to see others return to the Lord (v. 37).

When you think you have lost all courage, remember this story of Elijah. His fire and passion fueled his courage. Great devotional thoughts of John Maxwell.

I Kings 18:1-40

Elijah and Obadiah

18 After a long time, in the third year, the word of the Lord came to Elijah: “Go and present yourself to Ahab, and I will send rain on the land.” ² So Elijah went to present himself to Ahab.

Now the famine was severe in Samaria, ³ and Ahab had summoned Obadiah, his palace administrator. (Obadiah was a devout believer in the Lord. ⁴ While Jezebel was killing off the Lord’s prophets, Obadiah had taken a hundred prophets and hidden them in two caves, fifty in each, and had supplied them with food and water.) ⁵ Ahab had said to Obadiah, “Go through the land to all the springs and valleys. Maybe we can find some grass to keep the horses and mules alive so we will not have to kill any of our animals.” ⁶ So they divided the land they were to cover, Ahab going in one direction and Obadiah in another.

⁷ As Obadiah was walking along, Elijah met him. Obadiah recognized him, bowed down to the ground, and said, “Is it really you, my lord Elijah?”

⁸ “Yes,” he replied. “Go tell your master, ‘Elijah is here.’”

⁹ “What have I done wrong,” asked Obadiah, “that you are handing your servant over to Ahab to be put to death? ¹⁰ As surely as the Lord your God lives, there is not a nation or kingdom where my master has not sent someone to look for you. And whenever a nation or kingdom claimed you were not there, he made them swear they could not find you. ¹¹ But now you tell me to go to my master and say, ‘Elijah is here.’ ¹² I don’t know where the Spirit of the Lord may carry you when I leave you. If I go and tell Ahab and he doesn’t find you, he will kill me. Yet I, your servant, have worshiped the Lord since my youth. ¹³ Haven’t you heard, my lord, what I did while Jezebel was killing the prophets of the Lord? I hid a hundred of the Lord’s prophets in two caves, fifty in each, and supplied them with food and water. ¹⁴ And now you tell me to go to my master and say, ‘Elijah is here.’ He will kill me!”

¹⁵ Elijah said, “As the Lord Almighty lives, whom I serve, I will surely present myself to Ahab today.”

Elijah on Mount Carmel

¹⁶ So Obadiah went to meet Ahab and told him, and Ahab went to meet Elijah. ¹⁷ When he saw Elijah, he said to him, “Is that you, you troubler of Israel?”

¹⁸ “I have not made trouble for Israel,” Elijah replied. “But you and your father’s family have. You have abandoned the Lord’s commands and have followed the Baals. ¹⁹ Now summon the people from all over Israel to meet me on Mount Carmel. And bring the four hundred and fifty prophets of Baal and the four hundred prophets of Asherah, who eat at Jezebel’s table.”

²⁰ So Ahab sent word throughout all Israel and assembled the prophets on Mount Carmel. ²¹ Elijah went before the people and said, “How long will you waver between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow him; but if Baal is God, follow him.”

But the people said nothing.

²² Then Elijah said to them, “I am the only one of the Lord’s prophets left, but Baal has four hundred and fifty prophets. ²³ Get two bulls for us. Let Baal’s prophets choose one for themselves, and let them cut it into pieces and put it on the wood but not set fire to it. I will prepare the other bull and put it on the wood but not set fire to it. ²⁴ Then you call on the name of your god, and I will call on the name of the Lord. The god who answers by fire—he is God.”

Then all the people said, “What you say is good.”

²⁵ Elijah said to the prophets of Baal, “Choose one of the bulls and prepare it first, since there are so many of you. Call on the name of your god, but do not light the fire.” ²⁶ So they took the bull given them and prepared it.

Then they called on the name of Baal from morning till noon. “Baal, answer us!” they shouted. But there was no response; no one answered. And they danced around the altar they had made.

²⁷ At noon Elijah began to taunt them. “Shout louder!” he said. “Surely he is a god! Perhaps he is deep in thought, or busy, or traveling. Maybe he is sleeping and must be awakened.” ²⁸ So they shouted louder and slashed themselves with swords and spears, as was their custom, until their blood flowed. ²⁹ Midday passed, and they continued their frantic prophesying until the time for the evening sacrifice. But there was no response, no one answered, no one paid attention.

³⁰ Then Elijah said to all the people, “Come here to me.” They came to him, and he repaired the altar of the Lord, which had been torn down. ³¹ Elijah took twelve stones, one for each of the tribes descended from Jacob, to whom the word of the Lord had come, saying, “Your name shall be Israel.” ³² With the stones he built an altar in the name of the Lord, and he dug a trench around it large enough to hold two seahs^[a] of seed. ³³ He arranged the wood, cut the bull into pieces and laid it on the wood. Then he said to them, “Fill four large jars with water and pour it on the offering and on the wood.”

³⁴ “Do it again,” he said, and they did it again.

“Do it a third time,” he ordered, and they did it the third time. ³⁵ The water ran down around the altar and even filled the trench.

³⁶ At the time of sacrifice, the prophet Elijah stepped forward and prayed: “Lord, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Israel, let it be known today that you are God in Israel and that I am your servant and have done all these things at your command. ³⁷ Answer me, Lord, answer me, so these people will know that you, Lord, are God, and that you are turning their hearts back again.”

³⁸ Then the fire of the Lord fell and burned up the sacrifice, the wood, the stones, and the soil, and also licked up the water in the trench.

³⁹ When all the people saw this, they fell prostrate and cried, “The Lord—he is God! The Lord—he is God!”

⁴⁰ Then Elijah commanded them, “Seize the prophets of Baal. Don’t let anyone get away!” They seized them, and Elijah had them brought down to the Kishon Valley and slaughtered there.

The Results of David’s Servant Leadership:

1. It helped others see the contribution of every man’s gift. Even the older soldiers who remained at the camp because they were too tired to fight added some value to the entire army. They guarded the supplies. David’s perspective on valuing everyone’s gift and contribution kept everyone’s eyes on others and on the big picture, rather than becoming preoccupied with one’s own contribution.
2. It reminded David’s men that God was the trustworthy source of every good gift. David knew that allowing everyone to celebrate the victory and share in its spoils would help his men see that God was the trustworthy source of victory. When people start keeping score on who gets what, they tend to get consumed with themselves and whether they are getting their fair share of the reward. David’s servant leadership helped others see through God’s eyes and trust Him for their rewards in life.
3. It promoted goodwill in potential allies, resources that David enjoyed later as king. The people soon recognized that if you cooperate with David, he makes sure you win in some way. This promoted partnerships and a contagious spirit of service and goodwill among David’s troops. When leaders are selfish, it fosters a selfish atmosphere among everyone they lead. When leaders generously serve, this kind of service orientation spreads through the camp.
4. It enabled David to prepare for the future by making him friends all over Israel. When a leader serves today, it generally pays off tomorrow in relationships with others. David may not have realized it at the time, but as word spread of his generous style, his servant-leadership prepared the hearts of citizens across Israel to follow him. It won them over. Sometimes, little acts of kindness, unpromoted by leaders, spread faster than staged acts on a platform. One appears authentic while the other just looks artificial.
5. It developed a nationwide value of mutual benefit and good faith among people. Once David became king, this same spirit of appreciation and servanthood became the norm in Israel for a season. When leaders don’t sincerely grasp what they believe they deserve, it spawns trust among those who follow. A sense of justice-for-all prevails. Instead of contagious selfishness, there is infectious servanthood.

Imagine what might have happened had Nathan lacked security. Consider the odds stacked against him. He knew he had to confront David in his sin, yet David had covered up everything so well; no one else knew what had happened. That meant Nathan could expect no moral support. Further, the popular avid had led Israel to prominence among the nations, and most Israelites would side with David if he put up a fight. Finally, from a technical viewpoint, David hadn’t done anything illegal to Uriah. He had set up the man to be killed in battle by the Ammonites, but it wasn’t his spear or sword that took Uriah’s life. Nathan had to feel utterly secure in his plan of attack, or it would backfire.

What enabled Nathan to demonstrate secure leadership?

1. Nathan hadn’t done anything God’s truth behind him. He didn’t have to stand alone against David.
2. Nathan had a relationship with David. Their friendship created the bridge that allowed Nathan to do what God called him to do.
3. Nathan’s identity depended upon his divine call, not his popularity. Nathan determined to speak God’s truth regardless of the popular reaction.
4. Nathan understood his personal mission. He operated out of deep conviction.
5. Nathan was humble and broken. He had nothing to lose, for he had died to personal ambition.

Common Symptoms of Insecurity

The following symptoms usually indicate feelings of insecurity:

1. Comparison – We compare ourselves with others and keep score.
2. Compensation – We feel like a victim and must compensate for our losses.
3. Competition – We become self-consumed and try to outdo others for attention.
4. Compulsion – We feel driven to person in order to gain others’ approval.
5. Condemnation – We judge others or ourselves, resulting in self-pity or conceit.
6. Control – We feel we must take charge, protect our interests, and manipulate.

Four Keys of Security

To reduce personal insecurities, build the following four ingredients into your life:

1. Identity: Establish your identity in Christ, not in performance.
2. Brokenness: Allow God to break you of self-sufficiency and self-promotion.
3. Purpose: Discover and practice your God-given purpose in life, not someone else’s.
4. Give and receive the blessing: Learn to affirm others and receive affirmation.

Can you think of any more to add?

Find ways to apply these security ingredients in your life.

Peter Drucker, the father of American management, believes that 60 percent of all management problems result from faulty communication. Having a message doesn’t matter if leaders don’t communicate clearly and motivate others.

It is incredible how God wired us. We can listen to a leader expound for 30 minutes, flinging thoughts and ideas about the room. He just talks, opens his mouth to make a few sounds – and yet we want to get up and pursue those ideas.

This is the power of communication. Proverbs 18:21 tells us, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.”

During his day, Samuel was the master of communication. Everyone listened to him. What kind of communicator was he? Look at the following examples:

1. He spoke words of revelation (I Samuel 7:3). His communication contained divine revelation, insights that the people lacked.
2. He spoke words of inspiration (I Samuel 10:3-6). His communication inspired Saul to overcome his fears and take a step forward.
3. He spoke words of exhortation (I Samuel 10:24). His communication encouraged the people to act and follow Saul as their new king.
4. He spoke words of affirmation (I Samuel 10:24). His communication affirmed, supported, and endorsed Saul publicly.
5. He spoke words of information (I Samuel 10:24). His communication overflowed with good content, edifying, and teaching others.
6. He spoke words of declaration (I Samuel 12:20-25). His communication gave clear direction to the people and hope for their future.

How Did He Do It?

Each time Samuel spoke, he followed the rules below:

1. Simplify the message. He spoke forthrightly, clearly, and simply. No one wondered what he meant.
2. See the person. He always empathized with others. He knew his audience.
3. Show the truth. He demonstrated credibility with his passion and his life. He lived what he said.
4. See the response. He always spoke with a purpose. When finished, he urged the people to obey God.

I Samuel 10:3-12:25

Then you will go on from there until you reach the great tree of Tabor. Three men going up to worship God at Bethel will meet you there. One will be carrying three young goats, another three loaves of bread, and another a skin of wine. ⁴ They will greet you and offer you two loaves of bread, which you will accept from them.

⁵ “After that you will go to Gibeah of God, where there is a Philistine outpost. As you approach the town, you will meet a procession of prophets coming down from the high place with lyres, timbrels, pipes and harps being played before them, and they will be prophesying. ⁶ The Spirit of the Lord will come powerfully upon you, and you will prophesy with them; and you will be changed into a different person. ⁷ Once these signs are fulfilled, do whatever your hand finds to do, for God is with you.

⁸ “Go down ahead of me to Gilgal. I will surely come down to you to sacrifice burnt offerings and fellowship offerings, but you must wait seven days until I come to you and tell you what you are to do.”

Saul Made King

⁹ As Saul turned to leave Samuel, God changed Saul’s heart, and all these signs were fulfilled that day. ¹⁰ When he and his servant arrived at Gibeah, a procession of prophets met him; the Spirit of God came powerfully upon him, and he joined in their prophesying. ¹¹ When all those who had formerly known him saw him prophesying with the prophets, they asked each other, “What is this that has happened to the son of Kish? Is Saul also among the prophets?”

¹² A man who lived there answered, “And who is their father?” So it became a saying: “Is Saul also among the prophets?” ¹³ After Saul stopped prophesying, he went to the high place.

¹⁴ Now Saul’s uncle asked him and his servant, “Where have you been?”

“Looking for the donkeys,” he said. “But when we saw they were not to be found, we went to Samuel.”

¹⁵ Saul’s uncle said, “Tell me what Samuel said to you.”

¹⁶ Saul replied, “He assured us that the donkeys had been found.” But he did not tell his uncle what Samuel had said about the kingship.

¹⁷ Samuel summoned the people of Israel to the Lord at Mizpah ¹⁸ and said to them, “This is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says: ‘I brought Israel up out of Egypt, and I delivered you from the power of Egypt and all the kingdoms that oppressed you.’ ¹⁹ But you have now rejected your God, who saves you out of all your disasters and calamities. And you have said, ‘No, appoint a king over us.’ So now present yourselves before the Lord by your tribes and clans.”

²⁰ When Samuel had all Israel come forward by tribes, the tribe of Benjamin was taken by lot. ²¹ Then he brought forward the tribe of Benjamin, clan by clan, and Matri’s clan was taken. Finally Saul son of Kish was taken. But when they looked for him, he was not to be found. ²² So they inquired further of the Lord, “Has the man come here yet?”

And the Lord said, “Yes, he has hidden himself among the supplies.”

²³ They ran and brought him out, and as he stood among the people he was a head taller than any of the others. ²⁴ Samuel said to all the people, “Do you see the man the Lord has chosen? There is no one like him among all the people.”

Then the people shouted, “Long live the king!”

²⁵ Samuel explained to the people the rights and duties of kingship. He wrote them down on a scroll and deposited it before the Lord. Then Samuel dismissed the people to go to their own homes.

²⁶ Saul also went to his home in Gibeah, accompanied by valiant men whose hearts God had touched. ²⁷ But some scoundrels said, “How can this fellow save us?” They despised him and brought him no gifts. But Saul kept silent.

Saul Rescues the City of Jabesh

11 Nahash^[a] the Ammonite went up and besieged Jabesh Gilead. And all the men of Jabesh said to him, “Make a treaty with us, and we will be subject to you.”

² But Nahash the Ammonite replied, “I will make a treaty with you only on the condition that I gouge out the right eye of every one of you and so bring disgrace on all Israel.”

³ The elders of Jabesh said to him, “Give us seven days so we can send messengers throughout Israel; if no one comes to rescue us, we will surrender to you.”

⁴ When the messengers came to Gibeah of Saul and reported these terms to the people, they all wept aloud. ⁵ Just then Saul was returning from the fields, behind his oxen, and he asked, “What is wrong with everyone? Why are they weeping?” Then they repeated to him what the men of Jabesh had said.

⁶ When Saul heard their words, the Spirit of God came powerfully upon him, and he burned with anger. ⁷ He took a pair of oxen, cut them into pieces, and sent the pieces by messengers throughout Israel, proclaiming, “This is what will be done to the oxen of anyone who does not follow Saul and Samuel.” Then the terror of the Lord fell on the people, and they came out together as one. ⁸ When Saul mustered them at Bezek, the men of Israel numbered three hundred thousand and those of Judah thirty thousand.

⁹ They told the messengers who had come, “Say to the men of Jabesh Gilead, ‘By the time the sun is hot tomorrow, you will be rescued.’” When the messengers went and reported this to the men of Jabesh, they were elated. ¹⁰ They said to the Ammonites, “Tomorrow we will surrender to you, and you can do to us whatever you like.”

¹¹ The next day Saul separated his men into three divisions; during the last watch of the night they broke into the camp of the Ammonites and slaughtered them until the heat of the day. Those who survived were scattered, so that no two of them were left together.

Saul Confirmed as King

¹² The people then said to Samuel, “Who was it that asked, ‘Shall Saul reign over us?’ Turn these men over to us so that we may put them to death.”

¹³ But Saul said, “No one will be put to death today, for this day the Lord has rescued Israel.”

¹⁴ Then Samuel said to the people, “Come, let us go to Gilgal and there renew the kingship.” ¹⁵ So all the people went to Gilgal and made Saul king in the presence of the Lord. There they sacrificed fellowship offerings before the Lord, and Saul and all the Israelites held a great celebration.

Samuel’s Farewell Speech

12 Samuel said to all Israel, “I have listened to everything you said to me and have set a king over you. ² Now you have a king as your leader. As for me, I am old and gray, and my sons are here with you. I have been your leader from my youth until this day. ³ Here I stand. Testify against me in the presence of the Lord and his anointed. Whose ox have I taken? Whose donkey have I taken? Whom have I cheated? Whom have I oppressed? From whose hand have I accepted a bribe to make me shut my eyes? If I have done any of these things, I will make it right.”

⁴ “You have not cheated or oppressed us,” they replied. “You have not taken anything from anyone’s hand.”

⁵ Samuel said to them, “The Lord is witness against you, and also his anointed is witness this day, that you have not found anything in my hand.”

“He is witness,” they said.

⁶ Then Samuel said to the people, “It is the Lord who appointed Moses and Aaron and brought your ancestors up out of Egypt. ⁷ Now then, stand here, because I am going to confront you with evidence before the Lord as to all the righteous acts performed by the Lord for you and your ancestors.

⁸ “After Jacob entered Egypt, they cried to the Lord for help, and the Lord sent Moses and Aaron, who brought your ancestors out of Egypt and settled them in this place.

⁹ “But they forgot the Lord their God; so he sold them into the hand of Sisera, the commander of the army of Hazor, and into the hands of the Philistines and the king of Moab, who fought against them. ¹⁰ They cried out to the Lord and said, ‘We have sinned; we have forsaken the Lord and served the Baals and the Ashtoreths. But now deliver us from the hands of our enemies, and we will serve you.’ ¹¹ Then the Lord sent Jerub-Baal,^[b] Barak,^[c] Jephthah and Samuel,^[d] and he delivered you from the hands of your enemies all around you, so that you lived in safety.

¹² “But when you saw that Nahash king of the Ammonites was moving against you, you said to me, ‘No, we want a king to rule over us’—even though the Lord your God was your king. ¹³ Now here is the king you have chosen, the one you asked for; see, the Lord has set a king over you. ¹⁴ If you fear the Lord and serve and obey him and do not rebel against his commands, and if both you and the king who reigns over you follow the Lord your God—good! ¹⁵ But if you do not obey the Lord, and if you rebel against his commands, his hand will be against you, as it was against your ancestors.

¹⁶ “Now then, stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes! ¹⁷ Is it not wheat harvest now? I will call on the Lord to send thunder and rain. And you will realize what an evil thing you did in the eyes of the Lord when you asked for a king.”

¹⁸ Then Samuel called on the Lord, and that same day the Lord sent thunder and rain. So all the people stood in awe of the Lord and of Samuel.

¹⁹ The people all said to Samuel, “Pray to the Lord your God for your servants so that we will not die, for we have added to all our other sins the evil of asking for a king.”

²⁰ “Do not be afraid,” Samuel replied. “You have done all this evil; yet do not turn away from the Lord, but serve the Lord with all your heart. ²¹ Do not turn away after useless idols. They can do you no good, nor can they rescue you, because they are useless. ²² For the sake of his great name the Lord will not reject his people, because the Lord was pleased to make you his own. ²³ As for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the Lord by failing to pray for you. And I will teach you the way that is good and right. ²⁴ But be sure to fear the Lord and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you. ²⁵ Yet if you persist in doing evil, both you and your king will perish.”

Another excellent quality shared from John Maxwell’s leadership Bible. One that always motivates me to work harder at perfecting, as you become more transparent about your goals and what you can achieve when you master communication. Something I struggle with and am constantly aware of, identifying ways to continually improve.

If only the Israelites had remembered this lesson! Numbers 33 provides a review of the entire exodus journey, from Egypt to Jordan. And, boy, was it ever a journey! Tons of manna. Far too much grumbling. And it lasted 40 years.

Why didn’t the Israelites get to the Promised Land more quickly? Not because it lay so far away; they could have made the trip in two weeks. The real reason boils down to preparation. The people simply weren’t ready for God’s blessing until 40 years after they began their trip.

How about you? How is your self-discipline? Plato said, “The first and best victory is to conquer self.” If you want to be a leader with self-discipline, follow these action points:

1. Develop and follow your priorities. All leaders are pressed for time, but the successful ones have a plan. If you can determine what’s really a priority and release yourself from everything else, it will be much easier to follow through on what’s important. That’s the essence of self-discipline.
2. Make a disciplined lifestyle of your goal. To be successful, self-discipline can’t be a one-time event. It has to become a lifestyle. One of the best ways to nurture such a lifestyle is to develop systems and routines, especially in areas crucial to your long-term growth and success. Once you have them, put them to use every day for the rest of your life.
3. Challenge your excuses. Challenge and eliminate any tendency you may have to make excuses. If you can name several reason why you can’t be self-disciplined, realize that they are really just barriers to your success – all of which need to be challenged if you want to go to the next level.
4. Remove rewards until you finish the job. If you lack self-discipline, you may be in the habit of enjoying dessert before eating your vegetables. Mike Delaney offered good counsel: He said that businesses need to differentiate betwen their shirkers and their workers, because if they reward both the same, they’ll soon find they have a lot more of the former than the latter!
5. Stay focused on results. Anytime you concentrate on the difficulty of the work instead of its results, you’re likely to become discouraged. The next time you’re facing a must-do task and you’re thinking of doing what’s convenient instead of paying the price, change your focus. Count the benefits of doing what’s right, and then dive in.

What challenges force you to take action? Finding ways you are self-disciplined make a difference. Read Numbers 33:1-49 for the full picture of this story. Another thought of John Maxwell.

Here are the stages in the journey of the Israelites when they came out of Egypt by divisions under the leadership of Moses and Aaron. ² At the Lord’s command Moses recorded the stages in their journey. This is their journey by stages:

³ The Israelites set out from Rameses on the fifteenth day of the first month, the day after the Passover. They marched out defiantly in full view of all the Egyptians, ⁴ who were burying all their firstborn, whom the Lord had struck down among them; for the Lord had brought judgment on their gods.

⁵ The Israelites left Rameses and camped at Sukkoth.

⁶ They left Sukkoth and camped at Etham, on the edge of the desert.

⁷ They left Etham, turned back to Pi Hahiroth, to the east of Baal Zephon, and camped near Migdol.

⁸ They left Pi Hahiroth^[a] and passed through the sea into the desert, and when they had traveled for three days in the Desert of Etham, they camped at Marah.

⁹ They left Marah and went to Elim, where there were twelve springs and seventy palm trees, and they camped there.

¹⁰ They left Elim and camped by the Red Sea.^[b]

¹¹ They left the Red Sea and camped in the Desert of Sin.

¹² They left the Desert of Sin and camped at Dophkah.

¹³ They left Dophkah and camped at Alush.

¹⁴ They left Alush and camped at Rephidim, where there was no water for the people to drink.

¹⁵ They left Rephidim and camped in the Desert of Sinai.

¹⁶ They left the Desert of Sinai and camped at Kibroth Hattaavah.

¹⁷ They left Kibroth Hattaavah and camped at Hazeroth.

¹⁸ They left Hazeroth and camped at Rithmah.

¹⁹ They left Rithmah and camped at Rimmon Perez.

²⁰ They left Rimmon Perez and camped at Libnah.

²¹ They left Libnah and camped at Rissah.

²² They left Rissah and camped at Kehelathah.

²³ They left Kehelathah and camped at Mount Shepher.

²⁴ They left Mount Shepher and camped at Haradah.

²⁵ They left Haradah and camped at Makheloth.

²⁶ They left Makheloth and camped at Tahath.

²⁷ They left Tahath and camped at Terah.

²⁸ They left Terah and camped at Mithkah.

²⁹ They left Mithkah and camped at Hashmonah.

³⁰ They left Hashmonah and camped at Moseroth.

³¹ They left Moseroth and camped at Bene Jaakan.

³² They left Bene Jaakan and camped at Hor Haggidgad.

³³ They left Hor Haggidgad and camped at Jotbathah.

³⁴ They left Jotbathah and camped at Abronah.

³⁵ They left Abronah and camped at Ezion Geber.

³⁶ They left Ezion Geber and camped at Kadesh, in the Desert of Zin.

³⁷ They left Kadesh and camped at Mount Hor, on the border of Edom. ³⁸ At the Lord’s command Aaron the priest went up Mount Hor, where he died on the first day of the fifth month of the fortieth year after the Israelites came out of Egypt. ³⁹ Aaron was a hundred and twenty-three years old when he died on Mount Hor.

⁴⁰ The Canaanite king of Arad, who lived in the Negev of Canaan, heard that the Israelites were coming.

⁴¹ They left Mount Hor and camped at Zalmonah.

⁴² They left Zalmonah and camped at Punon.

⁴³ They left Punon and camped at Oboth.

⁴⁴ They left Oboth and camped at Iye Abarim, on the border of Moab.

⁴⁵ They left Iye Abarim and camped at Dibon Gad.

⁴⁶ They left Dibon Gad and camped at Almon Diblathaim.

⁴⁷ They left Almon Diblathaim and camped in the mountains of Abarim, near Nebo.

⁴⁸ They left the mountains of Abarim and camped on the plains of Moab by the Jordan across from Jericho. ⁴⁹ There on the plains of Moab they camped along the Jordan from Beth Jeshimoth to Abel Shittim.

Isaac and Rebekah’s firstborn son, Esau, loved the great outdoors from very early in life. He became a skillful hunter, growing strong, resourceful, and as rugged as they come. But he lived so entirely in the present, depending solely on his own strength and resources, that he repeatedly failed to clearly see the future.

Esau succumbed to the kind of temptations that still entice leaders today. Take a look at six characteristics of Esau’s near-sightedness and see whether any of them might trouble you:

1. Esau focused solely on the here and now, convinced that tomorrow never comes.
2. Esau relied on his natural gifts and on his birth order rather than on God’s plan.
3. Esau’s shortsightedness prompted him to give up the ultimate to get the immediate (a single means).
4. Esau, favored by his father, may have thought that Isaac’s love would bail him out of any poor decision he might make.
5. Esau’s limited vision caused him to marry a Hittite, a choice which grieved his parents.
6. Esau’s clouded vision blinded him from the deception of his brother Jacob.

In a legacy symbolic of his life, Esau’s descendants became the enemies of Israel. Whenever you see the word Edom or read of Israel’s clashes with the Edomites in Scripture, think of Esau, for it is through him that these persistent opponents of Israel came into existence. The animosity between these two ancient peoples can be seen even in the Psalms: “Remember, O Lord, against the sons of Edom the day of Jerusalem, who said, ‘Raze it, raze it, to its very foundation!” (Ps. 137:7).

Today we remember Esau as a self-centered man with faulty vision. Hebrews 12:15,16 tells us to examine ourselves, “lest there be any fornicator or profane person like Esau, who for one morsel of food sold his birthright.”

And yet God extends His grace! Before Esau died, he showed that he had matured. Genesis 32 and 33 describe a fearful meeting between Esau and his estranged brother. When the pair finally meet after years of separation, Esau embraces the deceiver Jacob and forgives him on the spot. Could it be that before he closed his eyes for the last time, Esau finally saw with clear vision? Perhaps. But imagine what might have been had he developed that vision sooner!

Learn from others mistakes faster. Being open to this will help us be stronger in our own lives. Understanding the goals and a true vision will help us keep our priorities straight.

Hagar and Ishmael

16 Now Sarai, Abram’s wife, had borne him no children. But she had an Egyptian slave named Hagar; ² so she said to Abram, “The Lord has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my slave; perhaps I can build a family through her.”

Abram agreed to what Sarai said. ³ So after Abram had been living in Canaan ten years, Sarai his wife took her Egyptian slave Hagar and gave her to her husband to be his wife. ⁴ He slept with Hagar, and she conceived.

When she knew she was pregnant, she began to despise her mistress. ⁵ Then Sarai said to Abram, “You are responsible for the wrong I am suffering. I put my slave in your arms, and now that she knows she is pregnant, she despises me. May the Lord judge between you and me.”

⁶ “Your slave is in your hands,” Abram said. “Do with her whatever you think best.” Then Sarai mistreated Hagar; so she fled from her.

⁷ The angel of the Lord found Hagar near a spring in the desert; it was the spring that is beside the road to Shur. ⁸ And he said, “Hagar, slave of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?”

“I’m running away from my mistress Sarai,” she answered.

⁹ Then the angel of the Lord told her, “Go back to your mistress and submit to her.” ¹⁰ The angel added, “I will increase your descendants so much that they will be too numerous to count.”

¹¹ The angel of the Lord also said to her:

“You are now pregnant
    and you will give birth to a son.
You shall name him Ishmael,^[a]
    for the Lord has heard of your misery.
¹² He will be a wild donkey of a man;
    his hand will be against everyone
    and everyone’s hand against him,
and he will live in hostility
    toward^[b] all his brothers.”

¹³ She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “I have now seen^[c] the One who sees me.” ¹⁴ That is why the well was called Beer Lahai Roi^[d]; it is still there, between Kadesh and Bered.

¹⁵ So Hagar bore Abram a son, and Abram gave the name Ishmael to the son she had borne. ¹⁶ Abram was eighty-six years old when Hagar bore him Ishmael.

Those who master problem-solving, one of the 21 Indispensable qualities of a leader, find that it’s one of the fastest ways to gain leadership in any group. Anyone who can solve problems will never lack influence.

But the influence gained isn’t always positive.

Consider the case of Sarah. God told her husband, Abraham, that his offspring would grow as numerous as the sands of the seashore and the stars in the sky. But there was a problem: Sarah was barren and past the age of childbearing. As the years passed, God’s promise didn’t appear any closer to fulfillment.

Sarah faced a problem and felt compelled to find a solution. Lacking the patience to trust God to keep His promise, Sarah looked to her own methods. After waiting more than a decade for a son, she felt she had waited long enough and, unwisely, attempted to fulfill God’s will in her own way, through an Egyptian servant named Hagar.

Sarah’s solution, however, gave her no peace. When Hagar became pregnant by Abraham and bore a son named Ishmael, Sarah despised both Hagar and her newborn son. Hagar had done what she was asked, but satisfaction eluded Sarah.

Control Freak!

The actual problem facing Sarah was not a need for offspring, but her own impatience. Sarah wanted control, something that has afflicted many leaders throughout history. Instead of trusting God, Sarah tried to make the promise come true by using her own methods and according to her own timetable. She depended upon her own strength when she should have leaned on Almighty God. She illustrates what happens when an insecure leader tries to work independently of God. Insecure leaders:

1. Believe God is inattentive, absent, or even against them.
2. Allow their circumstances to determine their understanding of God’s character.
3. See life through a perspective of scarcity rather than abundance.
4. Become self-seeking and manipulative.
5. Feel intimidated and deal with others through intimidation.
6. Resent the success of others and angrily turn on them.
7. Think that if one person succeeds, someone else must lose.
8. Blame others for their dilemmas.
9. See themselves as martyrs.
10. Conclude that attempts at control are seen as more logical than trusting God.

Do you identify with Sarah? Do you struggle with a desire to control problems rather than doing things God’s way? If so, ask God to reveal how He would have you deal with your issues in a way that honors Him.

Identifying with the problem-solving that Sarah goes through starts with belief. When the faith in the belief is strong, everything aligns. How do you keep your faith strong as you figure out ways to solve problems?

This is the squirrel in our front yard that was thanking us for feeding it. The squirrels and birds have faith and belief that they will be fed every day. I think that is a miracle that the Lord provides.

“I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is good for you and leads you along the paths you should follow. Oh, that you had listened to my commands! Then you would have had peace flowing like a gentle river and righteousness rolling over you like waves in the sea” (Isaiah 48:17-18).

“Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand” (Isaiah 41:10).

“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ says the Lord. ‘They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope’” (Jeremiah 29:11).

These verses from the prophets Isaiah and Jeremiah paint a portrait of God and the nature of His relationship with us: He teaches us. He guides us. He is with us. He upholds us. He has plans for us. He loves us.

Because of who He is, which He has clearly revealed to us, we can trust Him. He is available for our cries for help (see Isaiah 30:19), and we can trust His guidance. “Your own ears will hear him. Right behind you a voice will say, ‘This is the way you should go,’ whether to the right or to the left” (Isaiah 30:21). Our loving Guide never fails us.

Take time to pray to thank God for who He is. Ask God to guide you in the choices you must make.

Discuss together or reflect on these questions:

Which of the verses listed above is your favorite?

What speaks to you in that description?

What are some methods God uses to guide you?

Read John 14:15-18. Who is your constant Advocate, Companion, and Guide? How have you experienced His guidance?

If you love me, obey my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. The world cannot receive him, because it isn’t looking for him and doesn’t recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you.

No, I will not abandon you as orphans – I will come to you.

On what decision in your life do you need God’s guidance?

Luke 18:1-8 suggests that we should appeal to God with persistence and patience.

One day Jesus told his disciples a story to show that they should always pray and never give up. There was a judge in a certain city,” he said, “who neither feared God nor cared about people. A widow of that city came to him repeatedly, saying, ‘Give me justice in this dispute with my enemy.’ The judge ignored her for a while, but finally he said to himself, ‘I don’t fear God or card about people, but this woman is driving me crazy. I’m going to see that she gets justice, because she is wearing me out with her constant requests!’”

Then the Lord said, “Learn a lesson from this unjust judge. Even he rendered a just decision in the end. So don’t you think God will surely give justice to his chosen people who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will grant justice to them quickly! But when the Son of Man returns, how many will he find on the earth who have faith?”

Consider these passages for further study on guidance:

Psalm 33:8 Let the whole world fear the Lord, and let everyone stand in awe of him.

Proverbs 20:24 The Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way?

James 1:5-8

If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. Such people should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Their loyalty is divided between God and the world, and they are unstable in everything they do.

I am grateful for Gary Chapman’s guidance on putting together these thoughts. It helps see ways that the Lord put in place to trust him so that we want him to guide us. Share ways that you allow the Lord to guide you.

Anger itself is not a sin, but harboring anger is sinful. Another Bible translation casts Solomon’s warning this way: “anger resides in the lap of fools” (Ecclesiastes 7:9). Notice the key word, “resides.” Fools let anger abide in them, “so consuming them that it obviously labels them as fools. This implies that those who are wise quickly manage their anger, thereby removing it. Anger was designed to be a visitor, never a resident, in the human heart. All of us experience anger, but holding anger inside, denying, withdrawing, and brooding is not the Christian response. In fact, harboring anger violates the clear teachings of Scripture. Bitterness grows from stored anger, and the Bible warns us against bitterness.

Feelings of anger should be a trigger, prompting us to look deeper and ask, Why do I really feel angry? Often, anger is a secondary emotion masking a primary emotion of sadness or fear. Only when we identify the root of anger can we address the cause directly. When we fixate only on the anger, we often lose our tempers.

Take time to pray, asking God…

To teach you to control your temper.

To give you the insight and discernment to know anger’s actual cause.

To uproot any bitterness in your soul.

Discuss and reflect on these questions:

Read descriptions of bitterness in Acts 8:23 For I see that you are full of bitterness and captive to sin.”

Romans 3:14 “Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness.”^[a]

Ephesians 4:31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.

Hebrews 12:15  See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.

What is associated with bitterness?

How well do you control your temper? Think of some recent times you felt angry and how you responded.

What are healthy ways to deal with and express anger?

Consider these passages for further study on anger:

Psalm 37:8 Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
    do not fret—it leads only to evil.

Proverbs 14:29 Whoever is patient has great understanding,
    but one who is quick-tempered displays folly.

James 1:19-20 My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, ²⁰ because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.

Thankful for these guiding thoughts of Gary Chapman.

Recently losing my love, Vincent, I have felt all these emotions in a whirlwind. Understanding them more helps me realize where to focus and ways that the Lord can help me. Trusting the Lord will take care of me through these trials and finding comfort.